Even This Can Lead to New Life

“Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you?” – Jesus

As I heard this verse, the truth of Christ of hit me – this – this pain, the feeling of being out of control, this ache…whatever you are facing –  is OK. This anxiety. This struggle in your chest. This whatever it is that is heavy and hard and you so wish weren’t happening… it’s OK. God is not found in the absence of struggle. He’s not found in the freedom from pain. God is found right here, in the ache or fear or disappointment or fatigue or whatever it is that isn’t easy to hold.

I think what Jesus is saying is – this is your life and you are allowed to embrace it. You’re allowed to admit the ache, the pain, the suffering in whatever form it is. This is the transformation process. Jesus walked through death, through pain, through suffering and in doing so found the life on the other side.

For so long, I worked tirelessly to shove away the anxiety, the worry, the fear, the pain I’d feel. Whatever was in my chest causing me to breathe so lightly, I’d resist and think it wasn’t “supposed to be like this”. But now, today, I am realizing that this is where and who I’m meant to be. This very pain is OK because if I lean into it. If I let go of my resistance, it actually is fine and even a part of the journey to the goodness beyond. Yes, I might be anxious some days. But do I also have to feel “bad” or “wrong” that I have anxiety? No. I don’t have to add another suffering of being mad on top of my already first suffering of fear. And same for you. Will you and I be sad? Frustrated? Disappointed? Afraid?…. yes. And those may be the very thresholds we step through toward new life. 

Here Jesus I think is calling us to embrace all of our lives. All of who we are is accepted into our growth. This is a part of the journey to what’s next. Jesus is saying “lean in. I’ve got you. Don’t lose yourself by denying this aspect of you. Allow me to show you there is life on the other side. And we must walk together through this space.” ,

I think that may be the hardest part – not just accepting when we aren’t doing well and have recognized suffering, but telling someone about it. “Self-help is no help at all.” Christ said. We are made for one another. We need others perspectives to get us out of our heads. Not only that, we also need to be known. Without full disclosure of the good and the ugly with the safest people in our life, shame thrives, doubt and fear, get to rule the show – because who’s going to refute them? People are here for us. God is here with, for, and around us. It’s a part of the process.

Embrace the suffering. 

Speak your truth. 

Be all that you are. 

This is where new life begins. 

When we own our stories, share them and give them away so God can show us He is here He is present He is with us in the pain we open ourselves to move past it, stronger, and braver than the time before.

I’m learning. I’m learning to speak up so shame doesn’t get it’s way. I’m learning that all of life is the crazy beautiful mix of easy and heavy miraculously wrapped and saturated in God who is Love.

And to put it so clearly and gently as Richard Rohr can:

“Jesus’ way of the cross could not, and would not, be a wrong path…. The Christian faith is saying that the pattern of transformation, the pattern that connects is always death transformed, not death avoided. The universal spiritual pattern is death and resurrection, or loss and renewal….

The genius of Jesus’ teaching is that he reveals that God uses tragedy, suffering, pain, betrayal, and death itself, not to wound us but, in fact, to bring us to a Larger Identity….

If we understand suffering to be whenever we are not in control, then we see why some form of suffering is absolutely necessary to teach us how to live beyond the illusion of control and give that back to God and the flow of reality.” – Just This

So may we, embrace all of our messy lovely lives and hearts and see God in them. May we be all that we are – trusting there is not shame in it. May we know in our deepest selves we are wholly lovable.  May we share our pains or fears with those who love us, and in doing so, may we discover the Christ who holds it all in unconditional love and growth toward freedom through it.

Grace & Peace & Namaste.

Little Extras

Summer goes so fast. It’s hard to fathom that August is coming to a close. This painting was the little gift I got to enjoy creating over my month after inspired by some white peonies a friend gave to me.

These truths of embracing your whole life and self and speaking what we think and feel we must keep quiet is all over Brene Brown’s work. I can’t recommend enough you start reading or listening to her today. Need a choice? The Gifts of Imperfection to read or Power of Vulnerability to listen.

I’m still thoroughly enjoying savoring the pages of Richard Rohr’s newest book Just This. Recommend the little (but “big”) read.

Only 30 mins of listening in, but I am already so grateful a loved one recommended the book Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be by Rachel Hollis. Loving it!

New tunes I picked for the month if you’re a music lover like me!

I took a pause of creating meditations this month through YogaBreathePray to soak in the present moments of Summer, but will continue to help the world and our minds and spirits through this small act if I can. Trust that no matter how often you repeat any small breathe of mindfulness or meditation, it is rewiring your mind toward calm, toward agility, toward rest, toward peace… it works friends.

During my pauses involved a lot of cooking, enjoying all the Summer goods. I took time to type up a favorite Summer recipe of mine if you’re looking for something great before the produce season changes: Summer Zucchini Corn Lasagna

That’s all for now! Here’s to entering the next seasons of life leaving behind the things that no longer serve us and forging ahead toward the new patters that do. By God’s grace and work alone.